Dear recent Orlando transplant:

Ok, so you just moved to Orlando from New York / Philly / Chicago / San Francisco / et al. You feel lost, uprooted, misplaced -- you're starting to think Orlando might suck. Eager to find some nightlife in this town, you go to Lattitudes on Church Street, Slingapour's on Wall Street and that mega-club on Orange Avenue owned by one of those Backstreet Boys (Orlando's finest celebrities). Maybe you even think International Drive, Citywalk or Downtown Disney is where everyone hangs out in this town. Now you really think Orlando sucks.

Well, you're wrong. There is more to this city than theme park "nightlife" and crappy clubs with guys wearing shiny shirts, but you have to know where to look. Instead of complaining about how lame Orlando is compared to your city of origin, why not get out there and support your new scene -- it's a lot better than you think! After all, you moved here for a reason, right? (I'm guessing to escape the cold weather.) So you can do one of two things: either 1) move back to the city you think is sooooo much more awesome or 2) quit bitchin', check the events below and DON'T SLEEP on the shit that is happening!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Valentine's Day = Van Halen + F*ck Love

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and you have two options -- you can join the masses by dining at an overcrowded restaurant with your sweetie OR you can get really drunk and rock out to the reunited Van Halen at the Amway Arena. My money is on the latter.

Whatever you choose to do on this corporate holiday from hell, be sure to stop by Crooked Bayou afterwards for our F*ck Love party.

To recap:

After this:

Come to this:

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