Dear recent Orlando transplant:

Ok, so you just moved to Orlando from New York / Philly / Chicago / San Francisco / et al. You feel lost, uprooted, misplaced -- you're starting to think Orlando might suck. Eager to find some nightlife in this town, you go to Lattitudes on Church Street, Slingapour's on Wall Street and that mega-club on Orange Avenue owned by one of those Backstreet Boys (Orlando's finest celebrities). Maybe you even think International Drive, Citywalk or Downtown Disney is where everyone hangs out in this town. Now you really think Orlando sucks.

Well, you're wrong. There is more to this city than theme park "nightlife" and crappy clubs with guys wearing shiny shirts, but you have to know where to look. Instead of complaining about how lame Orlando is compared to your city of origin, why not get out there and support your new scene -- it's a lot better than you think! After all, you moved here for a reason, right? (I'm guessing to escape the cold weather.) So you can do one of two things: either 1) move back to the city you think is sooooo much more awesome or 2) quit bitchin', check the events below and DON'T SLEEP on the shit that is happening!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Tonight: Good Look

Do you ever go out of town for a week, only to come back to piles of work and tons of unread emails? Multiply that times a million, add holiday shopping and voila: You have my life. No, I'm not complaining, just explaining the lack of activity around these parts.

Also, I don't have time to post about tonight's event (which kicks off a new monthly party and should be dope), so I am forced to copy/paste from Dustin Orlando's email. Have fun!


Good Look - A new monthly party for the art, design, fashion, and DJ community... (no shutter shades please)

Wednesday, December 17th, 2008

at Bikkuri Sushi Lounge
1915 E. Colonial
Orlando FL 32803

No cover 9-10 ($5 after 10pm)
2-4-1 beer and saki from 9pm-11pm
18+ welcome

DJ Keen-One (miami) Stereo 77 and a live performance by:
Crates Anatomy (3 turntables, an mpc, and an upright bass)

Hosted by:
A la Revenge & Filtered Sunshine Radio

Monday, December 8, 2008

Switch It Up

Let’s go back in time for a moment. The date is March 28, 2008 and it’s a million and one degrees. I’m sweating my face off while hanging out poolside at the Southseas Hotel in Miami Beach. This is my ninth straight year of attending the Winter Music Conference and I still haven’t learned my lesson: I’m not dressed properly for the scorching heat and am getting trashed on mojitos way too early in the day. My friends and I are at the Windish Agency day party, eagerly awaiting the major headliner of the moment: SWITCH. As the day goes on, more drinks are consumed, Groucho Marx novelty glasses provide much amusement and we dance to Drop the Lime and DJ Medhi. Somewhere in my drunken haze, I ask Mike Feinberg what time Switch is playing.

"He’s not."

Another WMC lesson not learned: sometimes the headliners bail. Had I been less drunk, I might remember why. His agency canceled, he’s double booked, he missed his flight -- it’s all coming to mind. (Although, I could be confusing the latter with Bloody Beetroots, who also missed their Rockbar gig.) The news is quite a blow, considering we’re specifically at this party to see him. The next morning at breakfast I beg Feinberg to bring Switch to the artist formerly known as the Saturday/Thursday party at Firestone. He tells me it’s already in the works.

Fast forward a few months: Saturday/Thursday is dead, leaving few options to host this big-name producer slash DJ from the UK. There aren’t many Orlando venues that can deliver a paying crowd without promoters losing their ass. Not to mention Orlando might not be the number one destination for a man of such accomplishment: he’s behind the music of M.I.A and Santogold (to name a few) and the founder of Dubsided Records, not to mention XLR8R’s Artist of the Year of 2007.

But Mike Feinberg and Pauly Crush are smart. Knowing Switch may not be overly eager to stop in the Sunshine State, they have set up a mini-tour to make it worth his while. So now it’s all up to YOU. In the name of all that’s good and holy, you MUST support their efforts!!! There are three options to catch the man in action and it is your duty as a club-going Floridian to be at one or all of them.

Thursday, December 11th in Orlando
Catch him at Icon with Pauly Crush, Mot, Andrew Spear and Queso
***Spend $30 at Covert or Beta and get a free ticket!***

Friday, December 12th in Ybor City
He’ll be at Pulp with Pauly Crush, Justin Scott and Estrange

Saturday, September 13th in Miami
Playing at the Heathrow Lounge with Pauly Crush, Jessica Who?, Keen One and Damaged Goods

And just for good measure, here are some of my favorite Switch remixes.

P Diddy Ft Christina Aguilera - Tell Me (Switch Remix).mp3

Freeform Five - No More Conversations (Switch Remix).mp3

CSS - Music Is My Hot Hot Sex (Switch Feat. Mapei Remix).mp3

The Futureheads - Worry About It Later (Switch Remix).mp3

Please do whatever it takes to get to one of these shows. Sell a kidney if you have to. Yes, he's just that good.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Prohibition Is Over! Now, Let's Drink!

December 5th is a big day in the history of drinking. Remember that time, back in the 20’s, when alcohol was illegal? Me neither. But today you can thank Utah for being the 36th state to ratify the 21st Amendment, which canceled out that lousy 18th Amendment for those of you playing along at home. So this weekend, why not raise a glass to Utah -- something I doubt you will ever do again -- to celebrate this glorious date in history. Then get wasted in honor of it. Here are some options to help you out.

Tonight, kick off your drinking binge at Heritage Square with the Orlando Holiday Brew Fest. For the (mere) $25 admission fee, they promise food, entertainment and (obviously) lots and lots of beer.

The boys of Get Mental are back tonight at Sky60 after a month-long hiatus. Not sure if this weekly party is going to continue in the future, but they promise madness and mayhem tonight. The weather will be in the 50s, which is not cold, people. So don’t complain, throw on an extra layer and enjoy the un-humid, non-sticky evening outdoors. Password for free admission: Fuck Rent, Let’s Party.

First Friday means one thing at the Peacock Room - Mexican wrestlers. The holiday edition of Club Queso features the usual cast of characters: Q-Burns, Atnarko and Sleazy McQueen. Free CD to the first 50 people.

Also tonight, Taste will be hosting a benefit party for Syd Zed. I don’t know the guy personally, but he got injured on the job, was misdiagnosed, and is now dealing with all kinds of workers comp hell on top of his injuries. If you click the info website, you can see pretty horrific photos of his foot or just read more about how he is being fucked over by the man. Support him tonight, along with local bands Franchise, The Mondellos, Jim O'Rourke, Hot Hands, The Saved 666 and DJs Cub and Dirty Sneakers.

Or, if you just feel like catching a movie, the Enzian will be presenting Gremlins as part of Popcorn Flicks at Winter Park Central Park at 7PM.

On to Saturday! You may have heard about the party I am throwing, but just in case... join Miss Becky (that's me!), Nigel and Cub for The Non-Denominational Holiday Funfest at the Peacock Room. God, I love The Simpsons.

A little band called The Misfits are also performing at Firestone on Saturday night. I’m guessing if you want to go see them, you probably wouldn’t come to my party anyway. And, since I can never resist a Jem and the Holograms reference, “We are The Misfits. Our songs are better. We are The Misfits, The Misfits, and we’re gonna get her!”

Have a lovely weekend and don’t forget to get drunk -- after all, it’s your constitutional right as an American. Thank you, Utah!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

The Non-Denominational Holiday Fun Fest!

That's right - we're throwing an all-inclusive party this weekend and you're invited. This Saturday at Peacock Room, join me, Nigel and Cub for our super duper holiday extravaganza. We'll be playing it all -- funk, soul, disco, hip hop, house, electro, 80's, 90's, and even some really bad holiday music. So join us as we wish you a merry Christmas, happy Chanukah, kwazy Kwanza, a tip-top Tet, and a solemn, dignified Ramadan.

Friday, November 28, 2008

When Black Friday Comes...

Welcome Orlando kids who have stayed in town this holiday weekend. I took the last few days off to do the family and cooking thing, but now I'm here with your leftover Thanksgiving weekend events.

Right now, as we speak (or, as I type would be more correct) The Milk District is hosting one of their killer parties in honor of Black Friday. Head over to Etoile Boutique, Covert and Beta for awesome sales, leftover potluck goodness, potent holiday punch and dope ass music. Party is happening until 7PM.

Tonight, don’t miss an awesome show concealed by a shitty marketing title. The 2K Sports Bounce Tour hits House of Blues tonight in an effort to promote video games. Oh, and Q-Tip and Cool Kids are headlining.

Over at BackBooth catch Too Hot Redux, a music and art show featuring Peter Baldwin, Unique Assassin with DJ Dirty Sneakers and aesthetic by Mokobun.

Peacock Room is helping you work off your extra helping of turkey with their Stuffed party, featuring Latenight Society, Atnarko and Tard.

Also helping you work off the Turkey Day fat are the Spam Allstars at The Social. The 9-pice band blends “electronic elements and turntables with Latin rhythms, funk, hip-hop and dub to create an eclectic, original sound.”

Saturday night don’t miss Mumpsy and Yip-Yip at BackBooth.

Also tomorrow night kicks off a new party - Secret Saturdays at Bikkuri Sushi. This week fesatures LT Smash and Kittybat.

Hope you’re having a great holiday weekend!

Friday, November 21, 2008

Free Mustache Rides and Other Weekend Events

Kids, I am letting you down this week. I blame it on massive lay-offs that have been happening in my office (they always go down on Friday), which also means I blame it on all George W. Fucking Bush. Anyways, I'm a tad distraught today since things are not well and I can't really write anything fun. Le sigh.

Also, it's Florida Classic weekend so my suggestion would be to avoid downtown all together.

Either way, here are some flyers. I promise more engaging posts in the future.

Free Mustache Rides @ Crooked Bayou:

Also, Hush @ The Warehouse Space, 630 W. Central Ave

Saturday - Devin the fucking Dude!!!! at BackBooth:

Also Saturday @ Redlight Redlight:

Good luck. I'll be drowning my sorrows in vodka and old movies with Marilyn Monroe while praying I get to keep my job. See you next week for all the Thanksgiving going-ons. (I'll be in a better mood, I swear).

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Pop Off is .... errr... Popping Off Tonight

The holiday edition of Pop Off is going down tonight at The Social. If you're so inclined to brave the semi-cold weather and get there at 9, you'll be rewarded with free admission and an hour of free wells and PBR tall boys. If you'd rather go a tad later, there will be $5 Patron shots to keep you warm and $1.50 PBR's for all you cheap hipsters. I would stick with these specials since the drinks are grossly over-priced at The Social these days. Music will be provided by the ever so talented Rocksteady Soundsystem (aka the dynamic duo of Kittybat and Diddles) along with the horribly named FISHDICKS + Hardersauce. 18 and up welcome, $5 cover after 10 PM.

PS... I love how fly Obama looks on the flyer.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Anti*Pop + Surrounded Art Show + Scorpios + Joe Jackson

And now for the weekend. As you read this, I’ll be exploring the exquisite Love Boat-esque city of Acapulco. Of course, there are a bajillion and one things going on in town while I’m gone... I’m pretty sure the universe does this on purpose. So if I happen to leave anything out, deal with it.

I’ve already posted about the Anti*Pop Music Festival this week, so go back and read that for a plethora of events happening this weekend.

Get Mental is on hiatus -- I think the last two weeks have been too insane for them and they need a break. The main event for tonight is Surrounded, a group art show featuring twelve of Orlando’s most talented artists, at the new Bold Hype Gallery next to Stardust Video. Artists on the roster include Dolla, Scott Scheidly, Andrew Spear, Charles Marklin, Johannah O'Donnell, Patrick Fatica and more. Check the flyer for full details.

When you’re ready to get your drink on, head over to Peacock Room to celebrate November birthdays with the 4th Annual Scorpio party with music provided by DJs Nigel and Spank. Doug Rhodehamel and Frank Barczak are celebrating their 40th birthdays and are officially over the hill.

I'm also showing my age a bit when I admit that I’m pretty bummed to be missing Joe Jackson at The Plaza Theatre but I guess I have to get over it.

As for the rest of the weekend, you’ll have to refer to my Anti*Pop post again because it’s late, I’m tired and I have to catch a flight in a few hours.

Hasta la vista!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Popcorn Flicks Presents Labyrinth

What happens when the Dark Crystal gets a glam 80's makeover? Throw in David Bowie and Jennifer Connelly goodness and you've got the movie that I loved slashed feared when I was a kid - Labyrinth. The baby on the M.C. Escher ceiling always freaked me out. Catch it tonight in all it's dated awesomeness at Central Park in Winter Park, as part of Popcorn Flicks presented by the Enzian.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

The Anti*Pop Music Festival Post

Anti*Pop 2008 is upon us and I'm doing a straight copy/paste from their Myspace page, since I am lazy. <3

ANTI*POP MUSIC FESTIVAL returns to Orlando! This November 13 - 16, Central Florida will once again play host to indie acts from all over the nation performing at venues including The Social, The Social Pavilion, The Plaza Theatre, Club Firestone, Will's Pub, AKA Lounge, The Gibson Showroom, Back Booth, Tanqueray's, Wall St. Plaza and more to be announced.

A limited number of festival passes are available for all 4 days good for admission to all Anti*Pop events. Get your passes while you can.

Otherwise, you can purchase tix to shows individually (prices vary $ 5 - 20)... PURCHASE TIX NOW FOR INDIVIDUAL SHOWS


Thu. 11.13
The Future On Films In Space
The Little Debbies
the social
18+ welcome
8 pm

Thu. 11.13
plaza theatre
18+ welcome
7 pm

Thu. 11.13
A Static Lullaby
back booth
all ages welcome
6 pm

Thu. 11.13
gibson showroom
18+ welcome
8 pm

Thu. 11.13
Attached Hands
Dangerous Animals
Basements of Florida
aka lounge
$ 7 tix available at the door
18+ welcome
8 pm

Fri. 11.14
Kayo Dot
Stephen Brodsky (Cave In)
the social
$ 12
18+ welcome
9 pm

Fri. 11.14
OWEN (Mike Kinsella)
Caithlin De Marrais (Rainer Maria)
aka lounge
18+ welcome
9 pm

Fri. 11.14
Kidz In The Hall
Rapper Big Pooh
back booth
$ 12
18+ welcome
8 pm

Fri. 11.14
$ 5 tix available at the door
21+ welcome
9 pm

Fri. 11.14
The Dark Romantics
Have Gun Will Travel
gibson showroom
$ 7 tix available at the door
18+ welcome
9 pm

Sat. 11.15
Suburban Legends
Tooth & The Enamels
club firestone
$ 15
all ages welcome
6 pm

Sat. 11.15
Mike Dunn & The Kings of New England
The Elms
back booth
$ 5 tix available at the door
7 pm

Sat. 11.15
The Postmarks
Rachel Goodrich
the social
$ 15
18+ welcome
9 pm

Sat. 11.15
The Goods
the social pavilion
$ 12
all ages welcome
7 pm

Sat. 11.15
So Help Me Rifle
Tele V. Cheeseburger
hosted by Tooth
$ 5
21+ welcome
9 pm

Sat. 11.15
MARK KOZELEK (of Red House Painters / Sun Kill Moon)
gibson showroom
$ 15
18+ welcome
8 pm

Sun. 11.16
CONOR OBERST and the mystic valley band
The Felice Brothers
Rig 1
club firestone
$ 20
all ages welcome
5 pm

Sun. 11.16
ANTI*POP CLOSING PARTY (after Conor Oberst)
the social
18+ welcome
free with Conor Oberst ticket or $ 7 at the door
9:30 pm


Anti*Pop tix may be purchased at Ticketmaster or the Social box office.



Bands interested in performing should submit via:

Friday, November 7, 2008

This Weekend: Miami vs. Orlando

As you may have already read in Mel’s post earlier this week, Miami is the place to be this weekend: tonight Toxic Avenger and Franki Chan, tomorrow Crookers. But maybe you can’t just drop everything and gallivant down there. Maybe you’re super loyal to this town or just broke as a joke, like me. In any case, if you’re staying put in O-town, here are some options.

Ahhh, the old Knock Knock. Before the travesty of the worst-named club in town, Suite B, there was a dirty yet comfortable dive bar for all the outcasts and lushes to intermingle. I have very fond memories of getting kicked in the head by drunk girls on the swing -- fun times! Whether you’re old enough to remember the debauchery or young enough to wonder what the hype was about, come to Sky60 tonight to relive it all. Billy Dill, accurately described as the "ring leader of this obnoxious circus of drunkards," will be celebrating his birthday tonight and the old crew of DJs -- Ken Sherry, Gomez, Q-Burns, Spear and MOT -- will be on hand to help you remember the good ol’ days. Password for free admission is "Joyride."

If jazz sounds like it’s more up your alley, check out The Windham Group over at Peacock along with Nigel and Sef-1.

By now you probably have heard that Redlight Redlight has moved out of the fascist Winter Park regime and have opened a new location at 745 Bennett Road, on the outskirts of Baldwin Park and near the lovely club Roxy (ps... don’t ever go to Roxy). Saturday night beginning at 8 PM they will be hosting a release party for Thomas Hooker Beer from Connecticut. Included on tap will be Hooker Blonde Ale, IPA, Hooker Lager and Irish Red, so go support Redlight's new location and be the first in Florida to try awesome North-Eastern beer.

If you’re old enough to remember the former Knock Knock, then you’re probably old enough to remember a hippie electronic band called Dubtribe Sound System. The male portion of the duo, Sunshine Jones, will be performing live, along with Buckner and Atnarko.

And Sunday, Sunday, Sunday is the day! Since the weather is so friggin beautiful, there will be another Beer Bomb Bike Tour starting at 3 PM at 903 Mills Market. Unconfirmed stops (may) include Dandelion, Wills, Wallys, Big Daddys, RedlightRedlight and will wrap up at Colonial Lanes in time for Rockstar Bowling. Bikes + Booze = <3.

Finally, if you’re still standing after all the beer and bike action, head over to Tanquerays for K-G and the Band. Check the full Blow Sundays' November schedule.

Whether you're in Miami, Orlando or Timbuktu, have an awesome and safe weekend!

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Doug Stanhope (and Hands Up!) @ Backbooth

Man Show veteran Doug Stanhope dresses like that guy you used to buy weed from in the back of the quickie mart when you were a git. He "bases himself out of Bisbee, Arizona, continuing to record, tour, pander, subvert and cancel according to the demands of supporting dogs Ichabod, Henry Philips and Bingo his Bipolar Girlfriend." He's a funny fucker.

Tonight, Stanhope was set to appear at Will's pub, which we know, is still not open, so instead, will appear at backbooth. Tickets are $20 (age 18 and older) and doors open at 10:30. Here's a video of what you can expect.

Also, stick around after the show for Hands Up!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Obama vs. McCain -- Your Options for Getting Wasted on Election Night

Ummm, do I even have to say it??? IF YOU HAVEN'T VOTED, YOU BETTER GET THE FUCK OUT THERE AND DO IT. This election is WAY TOO IMPORTANT so PLEASE DON'T THROW YOUR VOTE AWAY! I waited an hour and a half last week to vote early so you have ZERO excuses. (Unless you're voting for McCain. Then you can stay home.)

By now you must know that we here at Don't Sleep Orlando are backing Mr. Obama as our new fearless leader. Actually, I guess I can only speak for myself but I would assume Mel-a-Monster is down with the O-man too. So where can you party down (or, in the unlikely case of a Republican victory, drown your sorrows) on election night? Read on.

Before we get down to where you should spend your evening, I suggest you download this song, play it on repeat and then send every goddamn good vibe and positive thought to Obama as humanly possible.

Nas - Black President.mp3

Now, on to the festivities. Phat-N-Jazzy is hosting an Election Night Special with the 10-piece band of Gerry Williams. According to his Myspace page, his influences include Stevie Wonder, James Brown, Al Green, Johnny Guitar Watson and Prince, so you can't really go wrong there.

Over at the Matador, C. U. Next. Tuesday will be holding another election party to either "attempt to fix the last eight years or one hundred more in Iraq." Let's hope for the former.

And finally, while I do not usually support or endorse the lameness that is Church Street, the hip hop duo of DJ Y-Not and Dolo will be playing their election night street party. Warning: you may be surrounded by super-white republicans, but at least the music will be tight.

And download Y-NOT's latest mix of super awesome presidentialness to get you in the spirit!

And on a completely unrelated Halloween note, I had the best costume of all time: Stevie Wonder.

Yes We Can... Change the World!

Monday, November 3, 2008

This week....Get Ready

We begin to prepare ourselves for the upcoming week. Since i know that most of you don't know the first thing about time management, I decided to give you an early heads up of this week's amazing events.

First of all, here is your list of things to remember:
  • Many people love to conserve gas, so call out of work a few days this week so you can get yourself around to all the cool shit going on.
  • get plenty of sleep, take naps frequently throughout the day, sneak a snore in your office bathroom, learn to sleep with your eyes open
  • start a multi-vitamin regimen. Believe me, you'll need it.
This week, ladies and gentlemen, get ready.

Tonight, Monday November 3:

Pauly Crush has a big heart, really he does. He acts all tough and cool and whatnot, but hes really just a nice guy. And he's proving it tonight, cuz All profits go to the Orlando's Creative School for Children. This is a great time for you to get sloshed for a good cause, so prepare yourself for an other wise frugal and take a few extra dollars with you for the benefit of some kids, yeah?

Get in FREE before 11 by signing up on the CRUSH Guest List before 8pm every Monday. Free Beer and cheap shot specials all night!

Wednesday, November 5thTotally Michael and MC Chris tear it up at The Social, along with Whole Wheat Bread. Doors at 8:00PM, $12.00, All Ages. If youre like me and can't really stand MC Chris, shut up, buy some earplugs and drink heavily. Totally Michael is totally Worth it.

Tickets available at the Social Box Office, the door, and Ticketmaster locations.

I should have an interview with him, so check back for more info on that. Attend the show, rock out, go home and get some sleep (Thursday would be one of those opportune days to call out of work - tell them the you're having manic depressive episodes and you think its because of the election, then sleep all day.

Thursday, November 6th

Remember being 15 and thinking you were the coolest shit in the world cuz you knew the words to peaches? yeah, relive your golden adolescence tonight at the House of Blues with the freaking Presidents of the United States of America and appropriately celebrate the conclusion of the most fucked up election ever (regardless of who wins)

tickets will run you $18.50 - $53.00 and doors are at 7:00pm. All Ages welcome, check the website for info on where to buy tickets.

Friday, November 7th
Now, all that sleeping and not driving yourself to work pays off. Because Friday, you should drive your happy ass over to my hometown to hang out with the I Heart Comix crew at the Vagabond. Franki will once again roll through town with Toxie and Clayton in tow pretty much guaranteeing a night of debauchery for the rest of us.

Remember last time they were around? You do, vaguely. Maybe you shouldn't get so trashed at parties. Or maybe you should since it makes for entertainment for the rest of us.

See past Franki and Toxie galleries Here, Here and Here.

Saturday, November 8th

I strongly advise you sleep till at least 3 or 4 pm, eat a good nutritious meal (La Caretta and Taco bell are NOT considered nutritious) like around 5:50 and then get ready to head to Heathrow at 10 for MotherFucking Crookers.

Hosted by Bronques (yeah, that last night's party dude) and featuring our very own Pauly Crush, its bound to be a freaking fiasco, since a good chunk of O-town seems to be making the trip. Look for a write-up from Smile Contributor Vegas coming soon!

As always, KColl and I will be out and about, and for updates, interviews and whatever the hell else i feel like posting, you can always go check Smile For Camera! And come back later for updates on more Orlando Events from Becky, who I'm sure will give you passwords and info on all the fun nights for you local minded individuals.

So for now, let us share a moment of silent reflection, while we prepare ourselves for a fun fun intensive week!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

I Ain't Afraid of No Ghosts!

Halloween is a messy holiday. There's just something about mixing costumes with alcohol that leads to a super distorted sense of reality. And Halloween weekend in Orlando always means one thing -- a bunch of unprofessional drinkers (dressed as Pimps and Hos) descend upon downtown, drink themselves into oblivion and turn into complete and total douchebags. While you're bound to encounter a handful of these amateurs, you can steer clear of them by avoiding Church Street/Wall Street, and by attending any of the recommended events below:

If you're looking to engulf yourself in the chaotic mess of the annual downtown block party -- it's fun if you don't drive -- you're best bet (read: FREE) is to hit up the Halloween edition of Get Mental at Sky60. As homage to the upcoming election to rid the White House of Satan himself, the password for the evening is "Scarier Than Politicians." $5 without password.

In their annual Halloween tradition, Crooked Bayou will be hosting everyone's favorite Misfits cover band, Psycho 78. Jerry Baloney seems to like them, anyway. $5 cover.

The older and slightly eccentric crew will be over at the City Arts Factory for the Shine Psycho Circus Halloween Masquerade. Tons of stuff going on there -- check the over-saturated flyer (if you can read it) for details. $20 cover.

If the downtown mayhem ain't your scene, then make your way down Mills to Peacock Room for their annual Halloween party. I've seen people pull out all the stops to win the costume contest so it should be pretty interesting. $7 cover.

Ride your bike to Stardust Video and Bold Hype for their joint parking lot OMG WTF Halloween party. No cover.

More non-downtown action can be found at Taste in College Park, who is hosting A Funky Boogie-ween with the Windham Group and The Good Rub. $8 cover.

And finally, if you just want to get the fuck out of Orlando altogether, head over to party in Ybor with the Pulp kids for Lol-O-ween. Special guest (and my hero) DJ Mega. No cover with costume, $5 cover without.

Be safe, kids. If you do go out, I'll bet a million dollars you hear at least one of the following: Thriller, Ghostbusters or Highway to Hell. Bonus points if you hear all three!