Dear recent Orlando transplant:

Ok, so you just moved to Orlando from New York / Philly / Chicago / San Francisco / et al. You feel lost, uprooted, misplaced -- you're starting to think Orlando might suck. Eager to find some nightlife in this town, you go to Lattitudes on Church Street, Slingapour's on Wall Street and that mega-club on Orange Avenue owned by one of those Backstreet Boys (Orlando's finest celebrities). Maybe you even think International Drive, Citywalk or Downtown Disney is where everyone hangs out in this town. Now you really think Orlando sucks.

Well, you're wrong. There is more to this city than theme park "nightlife" and crappy clubs with guys wearing shiny shirts, but you have to know where to look. Instead of complaining about how lame Orlando is compared to your city of origin, why not get out there and support your new scene -- it's a lot better than you think! After all, you moved here for a reason, right? (I'm guessing to escape the cold weather.) So you can do one of two things: either 1) move back to the city you think is sooooo much more awesome or 2) quit bitchin', check the events below and DON'T SLEEP on the shit that is happening!

Monday, February 9, 2009

Have a Non-Sucky Valentine's Day

Where will you be this Valentine’s Day? Will you be fighting with your significant other because he/she has a different view of the day than you? Will you be drinking heavily to numb the lonely self-loathing that can only be induced by holidays invented by evil greeting card companies? Either way, you should be at Crooked Bayou this Saturday night for the Kiss ‘N Makeup party. Spear, MOT and I will even be decked out in Kiss makeup for the occasion. How often do you get to see DJs in Kiss makeup? Not often enough.



Word to your mother.

2 comments:

DJ Y-NOT said...

http://www.kissburger.com/

AT KISS BURGER... WE WANT TO PUT OUR MEAT INSIDE YOU!

Anonymous said...

too often...