Flyer-Only Friday

My apologies for the boring-ness that is to follow. Waaaaaay too busy.

Friday Night:

Get Mental will be back next week. In its place @ Sky60:


At Peacock Room:


At Crooked Bayou:


Saturday Night:

The return of Turbo Love Machine at Peacock!!!


Roger Sanchez at Firestone:

Hunker Down

From World Wide Words:

"The Oxford English Dictionary has a fine description of how to hunker: 'squat, with the haunches, knees, and ankles acutely bent, so as to bring the hams near the heels, and throw the whole weight upon the fore part of the feet.' The advantage of this position is that you're not only crouched close to the ground, so presenting a small target for whatever the universe chooses to throw at you, but you're also ready to move at a moment's notice."

If you're brave enough to face the wrath of Fay this evening, you (might) have some options. C. U. Next. Tuesday at Matador:



And word of mouth has it that Crooked Bayou is hosting a new Tuesday night hair metal party called... wait for it... Steel Vagina. Wow. They have assured their loyal patrons that they will be open tonight because they aren't afraid of a stupid li'l tropical storm.

PS... Stone Temple Pilots have canceled. Bummer.

Rock on, brave kids!

Cuatro de Julio aka 4th of July

If you're reading this – hello! No doubt you're here for the 4th of July festivities taking place this weekend. Thanks to the magic of Google Blogging scheduling technologies, by the time you read this, I will be here:



Ahhhhh, yes. A well-deserved vacation to the Bahamas, courtesy of the "Bank of Mom."

The recent posts here have been much like Miller Lite – taste great but less filling – and my only defense is that I'm just one (unpaid) person, with a 40+ hour day job, freelance gigs and an active social life on the side. But don't give up hope!!! In true campaign-style, I promise a new and improved DontSleepOrlando in the next few weeks!!! Once all this birthday vacation holiday craziness has slowed down, I will be back in full effect.

Until then, I will leave you with the best things I know that are happening this fine weekend:

Thursday:



Ummm... Crue Fest?!? Fuck yeah!!! But it's sold out. If you don't have tickets, maybe you should just rest up for Friday. Don't go to Red Hot and Boom – trust me.

Friday:



Tons of BBQs and all that. I still haven't heard anything about the annual drunken bike ride, so I have no clue if that's in effect. The fireworks at Lake Eola should be amazing, as always, and they can be viewed beautifully at Sky60, the rooftop bar overlooking downtown. Stick around for Get Mental, the new Friday party featuring MOT and Andrew Spear. Password for free admission is: "I'm here to do the Indepen-dance."

Saturday:



KG and The Band is playing at The Social and I've heard they're good. It's almost 5 am now, so this is the best I can do.

Have a safe and happy weekend, kids! Wish I could be here to enjoy it with you (we'll both get over it, I'm sure!!!).

Working for the Weekend

Ok, so I've been slacking. Well, technically, I've been too busy to breathe, forcing me to put my beloved event blog on the back burner. I missed the chance to call Steve "DJ to the Stars" Aoki an Asian jumping bean! I missed the chance to talk about the last-Thursday-of-the-month debauchery that is Velvet Sessions at the Hard Rock Hotel, where $25 bucks will get you free drinks AND a slightly washed-up (although completely awesome) rock star. I even missed a prime opportunity to make fun of Bret Michaels!!! Naw, I'm still going to post that one:



And the best glam rock cover of all time? Look What The Cat Dragged In!!!



Now, on to the weekend.

Tonight the legendary Eddie -- errrr --- Charlie Murphy will be performing at Hard Rock Live. I wonder if anyone has ever told him that he looks like his brother??? Naw. I also wonder if anyone would know him if it weren't for the long-lost Chapelle Show.



And now for a shameless self plug: I'll be DJing with Cub Saturday night at RV's Studio. That's the same warehouse space used for the Pintura Grafitti Conference a few weeks ago, in case you weren't sure (I wasn't). We'll be doing the funk/soul/disco thing if you're down. It's an early gig -- 6 to 10 PM and here's the flyer:



And, as much as I like to be an Orlando cheerleader, I have to admit sometimes there ain't shit going on. Nothing I care about, anyway.

It's these desperate times when we are forced to take road trips and I would suggest partying down with the St. Pete kids over at the Vitale Studio. They're having an art show dedicated to the baddest gang in Coney Island: The Warriors. A few Orlando artists will be showing -- Dolla, Andrew Spear, Johannah O'Donnell, Adriaan Mol, Terribly Odd, Horsebites -- among St. Pete's finest: Bask, John Vitale, Joey Vitale and a ton more. Click the (semi-unreadable) flyer for all the info.



And a St. Pete Saturday night wouldn't be the same without visiting The Lobby for some DJ Mega action. Oh burrrrrrg!



Back in Orlando, Sunday night brings the return of Rockstar Bowling to the infamous Colonial Lanes. What exactly is Rockstar Bowling, you ask? Imagine all the bartenders in town getting together every other week for three games of bowling and booze. It's basically their "Saturday" night throwdown and things can get pretty messy (in a good way). Not for the faint of heart or those who can't handle Monday morning hangovers.



Don't feel like bowling? Just show up to drink at their super dope retro bar and watch Hearst from Sky60 intimidate the other teams.

Have a nice weekend, kids!

Beer fest + John Beltran + SOS Band + Tittsworth

Blogger power outages and a musical about two witches has left me MIA the past few days. (ADD moment: speaking of MIA, I am absolutely in love with the Soulwax remix of 'Paper Planes,' a song that is normally almost unlistenable. Go download it from Glitter and Gold right now!!!!!) Also, forgive me if I don't link everything below -- I am running late, as usual. Anyways, what was I saying? Oh yes...

This weekend is totally going off. Tonight there's an over-priced Beer Fest taking place at Heritage Square that may be worth checking out. Maybe, maybe not. Sometimes these things can turn into drunken frat boy fests (try saying that five times fast!). Not my scene, jellybean.

The Fast Forward crew will be bringing another one of Ubiquity's golden boys, John Beltran, to DJ at the Peacock Room this evening, alongside Dr. Um and Riverside. Nujazz, soul, funk, broken beat and house music lovers unite!



And on to Saturday's events.

The house kids in this town have been trying to pull together a daytime pool party for ages, and it seems as though it's finally happening on the roof of the Vue building downtown. Not too shabby. The free party goes from 12 - 6 PM with DJs Atnarko, Edson, Rob Slac, Mo Negro, Nat, Buckner and TARD.



Old skool kids can relive their Firestone days for a good cause. Tomorrow night a memorial party will be held for Donald Johnson in an effort to raise money for the family he left behind. The lineup includes Stylus, Sandy, Rob E and more. Click the flyer for full details.



Orlando is on a roll with awesome disco-band reunions -- tomorrow Star 95.4 will host a free block party on Central Ave between Orange and Magnolia. Who's performing? None other than the S.O.S. Band. You know them -- they sing "Baby we can do it, take your time, do it right, we can do it baby, do it tonight!" Since I can't find any awesome funked out photos of the band, here is a great album cover that could have easily been shot last week at a hipster fashion show.



And here are two dope songs from the same album:

S.O.S. Band - You Shake Me Up.mp3
S.O.S. Band - Can't Get Enough.mp3

The big event of the weekend will take place right down the street from the block party. Art and music nerds alike will be flocking to the warehouse space at 630 West Central Ave. for the Pintura International Graffiti Conference. The all-day event begins at noon and will continue until the wee hours of the AM. Headlining the event is Tittsworth; other talent on the bill includes Kittybat, Swamburger, Phat-N-Jazzy Collective, Andrew Spear, MOT, Mega, Cub and a ton more. Find all of the details on WPIentertainment.com and MBArtProjects.com.



Grab the Tittsworth remix of AC/DC at Awkward Pirates (and grab the Crookers version too, it's sick).

And finally, if warehouse graffiti parties aren't your thing, the Peacock Room is hosting its new monthly hair metal party, "Turbo Love Machine," and DJing this month are Anti Social and Angry Asian. Come prepared to rock out with your cock out.

Kool's Gang vs. DIZ vs. Balls to the Wall

For most Orlando-ites, the versus factor this weekend won't mean a damn thing. But if your musical taste is as eclectic as mine (read: ADD... ooooh, shiny!), then the options should have you pretty stoked. The decision basically comes down to this -- do you prefer:

A) Disco + beads, + theme parks
B) Chicago-flavored house music + tater tots + hallways(?)
C) Heavy metal + Aquanet hairspray + leather

Answers:

A) As I have mentioned before, sometimes it's necessary to visit the theme parks to see awesome performers 20 years past their prime. If funk/soul/disco is your forte and you don't mind rubbing elbows with tourists or shelling out $40 - 50, then check out Kool and the Gang at Universal Studios Mardi Gras. It's unclear if the band will break out such gems as Open Sesame or Be My Lady, but you can bet a million dollars you'll be singing Celebration and Ladies Night with middle-aged drunk tourists wearing Bermuda shorts and Mardi Gras beads. If I wasn't flat-ass broke, I would sooooo be there.  Thankfully, Earth, Wind and Fire is coming in April!

Here's another one they won't play -- Steppin' Out -- check the video for one of my favorite songs ever.

B) If you prefer the thumping beats of discofied house music, Chicago's very own Diz will be DJing at Crooked Bayou with Latenight Society and Bill Gold. When I was unhealthily obsessed with Chicago house music, Diz was one of my idols -- right up there with Derrick Carter and DJ Heather. He's definitely one of the city's finest, and while his counterpart Iz (also known as Joshua) has played in Orlando numerous times, this will be Diz's first.

Sadly, it's rumored this party will be held in the hallway between Crooked and Suite B, rather than inside the bar itself. Why the sudden change of venue? Because Orlando's (sucky) sweetheart, Baby Anne, decided she wanted to play at Bayou instead. If I was bringing Diz, I would be PISSED. Hopefully this won't ruin it for the promoters.

Anyway, here is a video of Diz dropping a dope remix of Prince.

C) If options A or B didn't sound appealing, then C must be what you're looking for: a balls to the wall, 80's hair metal party entitled "Turbo Love Machine" at the Peacock Room -- hosted by Andrew Spear and Angry Asian. Anyone who witnessed Spear's Prince tribute party or any of his infamous art shows, knows they are in for a treat (not to mention the flyer is totally awesome!!!). Break out the Aquanet, leather, leopard prints, fishnets and black eyeliner, it's time for a fucking metal party.

To get in the proper mood , here is a 10-minute (plus) video of Eddie Van Halen doing a guitar solo. \m/